SUPERMAN RETURNS, YEA or NAY?

Figure 1 – Superman Returns Poster

Christopher Reeve was arguably the best post-George Reeves (no relation) Superman. A number of actors, beginning with Kirk Alyn in the 1948 b/w serial Superman (along with the late Noel Neill, who last appeared in Superman Returns in her final movie role) have played the character since then, but a lot of fans think Chris Reeve was the best Superman. As a dedicated Superman fan since about 1955, I will offer my own take on who’s best and whether 2006’s Superman Returns was a good take on the character.

Let’s get this out of the way: yes, I know Superman couldn’t exist as portrayed by any movie or TV actor; after all, the comic was inspired by Philip Wylie’s book Gladiator, and just about everything the character did is either unlikely or impossible, whether in the comics or on the big or small screen—some of the things he lifts, for example, would break up with that much force applied to such a small area (his hands). It’s simple physics. But I imprinted on him at about age 8, so there you go. Like a little duckling, I have to follow him around, so to speak.

Figure 2 – Action Comics No. 1

Figure 2 shows the 1938 first issue and major appearance of Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster’s character, though according to online sources, they had done an evil version of “Super-Man” in 1933. Siegel was the writer, and Shuster, born in Toronto, was the artist. Although he later had vision problems, Shuster managed to improve his artwork a lot as the comic progressed.

As a U.S. Air Force brat, I encountered Superman some time after our return from a 3-year sojourn in Britain; previously, my hero had been Frank Hampson’s Dan Dare, in the pages of the boys’ weekly paper, The Eagle. In the mid-‘50s, I watched George Reeves as Superman/Clark Kent; Phyllis Coates and Noel Neill as Lois Lane (along with John Hamilton as Perry White and Jack Larson as Jimmy Olsen—and Larson, as well as Ms. Neill, appeared for the last time onscreen in Superman Returns). I really liked Reeves’ Kent—he was more of an adult; a “real man” than any version until possibly Henry Cavill’s Kent.

There was no screen Supes between Kirk Alyn and George Reeves; Reeves’ Supes was large (Reeves was variously described as 6’ 1 1/2” to 6’ 3”), but not particularly muscular-looking. Although most Supermen of the comics have impossibly well-defined musculature, as did Henry Cavill’s, it’s not really necessary; someone born of heavy-gravity parents would probably be somewhat shorter than the Earth-born equivalent, and not necessarily looking particularly muscular. (That’s my own opinion, however.) Chris Reeve was slim, 6’ 4” tall, and put on 40+ pounds for the role, working with Dave Prowse (“Darth Vader”) to reach 225 lbs. of sheer muscle. (By contrast, Henry Cavill, only half an inch over six feet, is really muscular, IMO.) I’m not sure what the next Supes, David Corenswet, who is also 6’ 4” and weighs 221 lbs. according to the interwebz, will look like in uniform.

Figure 3 Christopher Reeve – Brandon Routh

Figure 3 shows a comparison between Reeve and Routh, showing some reasons the latter actor was chosen to play the part; there’s a distinct resemblance, though Routh didn’t “muscle up” like Reeve did. Here’s the thing: both portrayed Superman as a calm, self-controlled character—with strength of character as well as strength of body. The problem with this film was not the actor or character, it was the plot—and even that wasn’t too bad unless you were a nit-picker (like I am).

The strengths of the movie are Routh’s portrayal, as well as the special effects, which have obviously improved between Reeve’s last, Superman IV (1987), and Superman Returns (2006); in fact, I’d say they are pretty seamless in the latter movie (something the former tried for, but couldn’t quite match).

The plot of Returns is pretty good, bringing up questions of whether the world (obviously the same world as in Superman IV) really needs a Superman to save it; Lois Lane (Kate Bosworth) is to receive a Pulitzer prize for her article stating flatly that his presence is superfluous (sorry). Routh’s Supes has left the Earth to investigate whether there might be something Kryptonian out in the universe somewhere, and has been gone for five years, and the world has survived. Of course, he was the main witness against Lex Luthor (Kevin Spacey), who was released from prison when his witness didn’t appear at the trial. While in prison—or possibly out on bail, Lex has played up (in person or via snail mail, I guess) to super-rich (sorry again) heiress Gertrude Vanderworth (Noel Neill), and has “helped her” sign a will designating him as sole heir to her fortune. Oh, and while Supes was gone, Lois got pissed off, seems like, and married Perry White’s (Frank Langella) nephew Richard (James Marsden) and had a kid. (Whatever happened to “If it takes forever/I will wait for you”?)

Lex has also investigated the one thing that the world knows (apparently from the previous four movies with Chris Reeve) can hurt Supes—Kryptonite! This “souvenir from the old home town” (Luthor), combined with a crystal from the Fortress of Solitude (does everyone in the world know where that is? And how to get there? Isn’t that s’posed to be secret? Sheesh!), can apparently grow a new landmass in the Atlantic Ocean if Lex can just lathe it into a cylinder to enclose the crystal and shoot it into the middle of the ocean. (This ignores the “canon” fact that Kryptonite, being Kryptonian, should be as invulnerable as Supes himself and thus couldn’t be turned on a lathe).

Anyway, Lex’s henchpeople (including Kal Penn) break into a museum and steal the Kryptonite while his henchwoman Kitty (Parker Posey) distracts Supes and gets quite a crush on him. So, long story short—Lex steals Russian rocket, puts Kryptonite cylinder and crystal inside, and sends it off to the Atlantic, possibly endangering millions of people’s lives. (We’ve seen it before when Gene Hackman was Lex; Valerie Perrine said her mother lives in New Jersey, but Lex didn’t care. He’s just that kind of guy. As Hackman’s Lex said, “They’re not making any more land,” but Spacey’s Lex is doing just that!

Anyway, it turns out Lois’s kid might be half Kryptonian, and though Lex has unwittingly kidnapped her and her child, everything finally turns out all right. Yes, I’ve skipped a bunch of stuff—after all, some of you might have not watched this film because it got bad reviews. Overall, it’s not bad if you ignore the lapses in canon and logic. And Routh does get to play Supes in some DC TV shows, I understand, though his main DC role after this is Ray Palmer, The Atom.

I kind of liked the old cloth uniforms that were “woven by Martha Kent out of Superbaby’s blankets”—the new uniforms, whether with or without strong-man shorts, are too slick and glossy. And I dislike the modern “S” that James Gunn’s Superman, David Corenswet, will wear in the 2025 movie. A 3D plastic one, like the Routh and Cavill one, is bad enough. But I really like Rachel Brosnahan (“Mrs. Maisel”), who will play Lois Lane. So I’ll reserve judgement till I see it. Anyway—if you haven’t seen it, take a gander at Superman Returns and even if you have, watch it again and tell me what you liked or didn’t like about it. Okay?

Comments? Anyone? Bueller? You can comment here or on Facebook, or even by email (stevefah at hotmail dot com). All comments are welcome! (Just be polite, please.) My opinion is, as always, my own, and doesn’t necessarily reflect the views of Amazing Stories or its owner, editor, publisher or other columnists. See you next time!

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