Experimenter Publishing Goes Green, Announces Switch to Paper Made From Lunar Regolith

Hillsboro, NH 4/1/2019

VP Mike Pence’s announcement for NASA’s return to the Moon couldn’t have come at a better time.

Experimenter Publishing, publishers of the world’s first science fiction magazine, wanting to establish its credentials as a “green” (environmentally aware/climate change aware) organization, has been looking for a non-electronic alternative to paper made from wood for some time.

Switching to a non-tree-based paper would seriously reduce the magazine’s carbon foot print.  A variety of alternatives have been proposed, examined and rejected for a variety of reasons:

“We originally began with a retro-approach”, said Steve Davidson, publisher, “our thinking was that a lot of ancient technologies were more environmentally conscious and might perhaps be amenable to a modern, high-tech update.  Unfortunately, we discovered that very few people can read cunieform, and that kind of mitigates against the idea of a widely distributed magazine.  Painting on cave walls likewise.  Papyrus is plant based.”

Subsequent research led to the discovery of several companies researching and manufacturiing paper products made from rock.

“It’s currently more expensive than regular paper manufacturing, but that’s just an issue of scale and developing the market”, said Davidson.  “The real breakthrough came when we realized that we could marry our quest for greenness with NASA’s need to commercialize missions to the Moon.”

Dr. Feghoot, astrophysicist and Program Lead for NASA’s Make Money From Stuff in the Sky project (recently announced under executive order by the Trump Administration) explained, for the fifth time, that there are very few valuable resources worth developing on the Moon.  “Despite pictures provided to us by Don Jr., I can assure you that diamonds are not littered across the Lunar surface.  Of course, they may be hiding in all of those dark craters.  We certainly won’t know until we get back up there.  In the meantime, we do know there’s a lot of rock.  If we can ship that back to Earth and make paper out of it, well, maybe we’ve just found a good reason for going back there!”

An economic analysis conducted by the Gateway Corporation strongly suggests that the Moon has enough rock to meet all of the world’s paper needs for at least a couple of decades.