Kaaron Warren is a multi-award-winning Australian writer based in Canberra, Australia. She’s sold over 200 short stories to publications big and small around the world, including Ellen Datlow’s Year’s Best. She was Guest of Honour at World Fantasy, Stokercon and Genrecon.
Her latest novel is The Underhistory, from Viper Books, was described in the Guardian as ‘a beautifully constructed, suspenseful gothic tale’.
Her other novels are Slights, Mistification, Walking the Tree, The Grief Hole and Tide of Stone. She has seven short story collections. Her writing podcast Let the Cat In showcases ideas, objects, and inspirations.
If you had to survive in a fantasy world with only the contents of your fridge, what would be your game plan?
The contents of my fridge would help me survive against all odds. There’s the children’s Panadol that expired in 2013 and I recently threw out but we’ll pretend I didn’t. I’ll knock out the Chief Ogre with that by squirting some over his slab of raw steak. This will give the sprites time to carry out their coup. I’ll help by feeding them home-made pickles I bought at a market stall. These pickles will cure-all and just a mouthful is enough to power any sprite through the day.
I’d take off walking, then, once I know the world is a better place. I want to reach the other side of the city before sunset. I’m visiting my dearest friend, a centaur, and he and his family are being bothered by vampire horse flies. The plan is to make a huge vat of sauce out of all the bottles I have in my fridge, from garlic mayo to the modestly brilliant harissa I made from my own chillis. This will dispel those vampire horse flies and make my visit to my dear friend a pleasant one.
If you had to choose between being a time traveler or a space explorer, which would you pick and why?
Time traveller, for sure. I’d love to be able to go back and watch my own life as an observer. Wouldn’t this be fascinating? Watching all those big and small moments and maybe realising you misremembered them, or being blown away by the emotion of seeing a loved one again. Remembering good friends strangely forgotten. I’d love to sit on the couch and flick through recipe books again with my beloved grandmother, or at least watch myself as a ten year old doing this.
I’d also like to go back to my student house and see who it was who pretended to be a ghost that time we tried a Ouija board.
If you had to choose one of your books to be turned into a cheesy made-for-TV movie, which one would it be and who would you want to play the lead roles?
If you ignore all of the death in The Grief Hole, this would be a great cheesy show. From stamp-collecting to world-famous adored crooner, from art shows to sold out arenas, without the death you could build such a good sitcom around Sol Evictus and his hilarious trials with his ever-changing (not dying in the TV show) roster of personal guards and assistants.
Sol Evictus would be played by Matthew McConaughey, or Richard Roxborough, depending on where it was set.
His guards: Samara Weaving, Rose Byrne, Deborah Mailman, Anthony La Paglia, Bryan Brown, Aaron Pederson, Michelle Yeoh, Larry David, and anyone at all who wants to have a short but sweet role in this series.
What’s the silliest misconception you’ve had about something scientific, what was it and how did you learn you had misapprehended?
This one is a bit embarrassing. Years ago I went for a job interview with the CSIRO, the Australian science organisation. It was with The Helix magazine, which was part of the Double Helix Science Club. I really wanted this job so did what I thought was research and found out that there is a spiral in your ear called a helix. I thought I was prepared. So when the interviewer asked me if I knew what a double helix was, I confidently said, oh, that’s in your ear. The interviewer said, ‘any other thoughts on that?’. I had no other thoughts.
Of course the double helix is, in fact, the basis of our DNA and the whole club was named after it.
And yet I got the job!
What off-beat location would you like to see host a convention, and why?
Coober Pedy in South Australia. Most of the town is underground, because of the heat, and the surrounding area is filled with beauty and ancient stories. Let’s make it happen.
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Kaaron Warren can be found at –
https://kaaronwarren.wordpress.com/
Twitter @kaaronwarren
Insta Kaaron_Warren
Let the Cat In Podcast:
My latest novel The Underhistory, a haunted-house meets home invasion story.
https://serpentstail.com/work/the-underhistory/
The Grief Hole
https://ifwgpublishing.com/title-the-grief-hole-trade-paperback/
