I confess that, although I was a fan of the Resident Evil videogame, I kinda stopped playing after #5. Real life kept me too busy. But it had that eerie, creepy feeling that stayed with you even after you put the controller down. So when the 2002 movie, directed by Paul W.S. Anderson, with Milla Jovovich starring as Alice (Figure 2), came out, I watched it, although it didn’t seem to really match up with what I remembered. I became an instant fan, that movie, with Milla in her iconic red dress, was nearly perfect as an action/horror movie, with several CGI effects that I’d never seen before (the security laser slicer scene was so well done). So I watched all six live-action ones, even though the storyline got weirder and weirder as the series went on; and enjoyed every one, no matter how ridiculous the story was—great graphics and a terrific cast! (I even watched most of the animated ones.)
And here we are, more than twenty years later, and a new director is helming a new RE. With a new cast, naturally. There are very few similarities between this new movie and any that have gone before (there were also several animated RE movies, too); and I don’t know whether it adheres to any of the video games either. But what it’s got is excellent CGI, a good actor in what’s nearly a one-actor film (but not quite), and that same exciting feeling of dread and “what scary thing is coming next?” but that’s not all—it’s also very funny due to both the writing and the acting. Written (with Shay Hatten) and directed by Zach Cregger and loosely based on the RE franchise, it stars Austen Abrams as Bryan, a medical courier; with assistance from several people such as Zach Cherry as Carl (an Umbrella scientist); Kali Reis as Maxine (an Umbrella cop/enforcer); and Paul Walter Hauser and Will Merrick as Umbrella scientists—but really, Abrams carries the whole film on his shoulders.
(I’m only going to describe the first half of the movie, as I think this film is best experienced first-hand.) Bryan (Austen Abrams, Figure 3), a medical courier, is entering an emergency room carrying a pouch with a “B-7” (possibly a heart, a lung, a kidney), as Bryan approaches the hospital entrance, he’s on the phone with Michelle (Sara Paxton, voice only), his girlfriend. He’s urging her to take another test or two (obviously a pregnancy test), so there’s no need to panic (his words) before they’re sure. He enters, loudly announcing he has a B-7, but nobody seems to care—they’re all dealing with their own median emergencies; finally a doctor takes the case. Before he can leave, however, another person (doctor or nurse) asks him to do another delivery—but it’s to Raccoon City, in the mountains. Because it’s got to be there within an hour, and the roads are snowy and icy, they’ll pay double, so Bryan takes the job, assuring her he has four-wheel drive and chains.
He lied. As he navigates his POS compact car (which doesn’t even have winter tires, it looks like) through the snowy roads, he’s on the phone with Michelle, trying to convince her not to go visit her friend (code for bugging out on him—she thinks he’s trying to duck responsibility for her pregnancy); and as he’s looking down at his phone, which is getting very spotty reception, a woman (Figure 4) walks out onto the road and he hits her. As he screeches to a halt (btw—the tire tracks are way too straight), he drops the phone. Getting out of the car, he goes back to the big splotch in the road, but there’s no body—footsteps lead into the woods that are lining the road. He finds her lying on her back, with arms upraised, breathing heavily; he helps her up and takes her back to his car, putting her in the passenger seat. He assures her he’ll get her to a hospital, but she doesn’t speak. He takes off fairly quickly, but as he drives, she keeps reaching for him, putting her bloody hand in front of his face. He fends her off, swerving as he does so. Immediately, red and blue lights come on behind him. He tells the cop about her, and convinces him that she needs to ride with him (the officer). For some reason, the cop puts her in his passenger seat rather than in the back—horror fans will immediately realize this is a stupid decision.
Bryan takes a few minutes to mutter about his situation and the police officer’s comments, then starts his car and follows, but as he catches up to the police car, he sees it weave across the road and then nose down off the road, ending upside down. He pulls up and stops his car, then runs down to the upside-down police vehicle, noting that the officer is hanging upside down in his seat belt. He tries to open the door, but it’s locked, so he goes around to the passenger side, noting that It’s wide open and the woman isn’t there. Crawling into the car he attempts to rouse the cop, but is unsuccessful. While he’s in there, the woman, all beat and bloody, comes to the driver’s-side window, screaming and banging on the glass. She comes around to Bryan’s side, trying to grab him, but he kicks her away, then grabs the cop’s gun (a .45 automatic, looks like). She comes back and he kicks her away again, warning her that he’ll shoot. He tries, but the gun doesn’t fire. He kicks her away again, and crawls out of the car, trying desperately to find the safety; accidentally clicking it off, he fires a shot into the air, then runs away from her around the car. They continue chasing and being chased until he stops, waiting to shoot her, but she’s gone. As soon as he leaves the vicinity of the car, she’s rushing at him; he fires wildly, but misses her. He falls down as she rushes him, then fires a single shot, stopping her in her tracks.
Shortening this a bit—he makes his way toward a fenced-in farmhouse and barn; there are lights on the farm. He tries to jump the fence, but finds it’s electrified; getting zapped, he finally gets across, but he sees a black dog running at full speed towards him; he evades it long enough to get in the barn, climbing the ladder to the loft, where the dog can’t get him. After a while and some more interaction with the dog, which shows a surprising talent involving tentacles (tentacles will feature a lot in this film), he escapes the barn, and runs to the house. Finding it almost deserted, grabs a shotgun (his pistol is nearly empty; only 4 shots left in the clip) and finally finds the shells in an upstairs bedroom. There he is attacked by another woman, but he shoots her in the eye with his pistol—but the other woman, the one he shot before, runs into the house and upstairs, only to get her head blown off by his shotgun! While he is recovering from these two attacks, tentacles come out of the first woman’s neck and connect with tentacles coming from the second woman’s eye (Figure 5). And here’s where I have to leave you for the sake of not telling you everything. I mean, to quote Monty Python, “Where’s the fun in that?”
What I’ve told you—and I’ve left some stuff out—takes up less than half the film; from here it gets intense—but still there’s a lot of dark humour. It’s only in the very end of the movie that it falters. Although the actual end is fitting, I think for most people it would be very unsatisfactory, though I can’t tell you why. I did enjoy this movie, but I think it could have been ended just a bit better; I’ll leave you to figure out how and why. Let me know, once you’ve seen it, what you think.
NOTE: This column is in no way written, edited, proofed or composed by AI, though some of my photo editing software uses it in some capacity. This is a human column and will remain so.
0’d like to hear what you think about this column. I’m on Facebook, or you could email me (stevefah at hotmail dot com). If you liked it, let me know—if you hated it, let me know so I can do better! My opinion is, as always, my own, and doesn’t necessarily reflect the views of Amazing Stories or its owner, editor, publisher or other columnists. See you next time!
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